A life lost in transition

BY PMA RASHEED

The Gulf Today, 24 May 2010

MOHAMMED Abdulla's job involved discarding disposable tea cups. In a tragic twist of tale, his own life was crushed when the passenger plane crashed in South India's Mangalore airport on Saturday morning.

Sixty-year-old Abdulla has been working as an outdoor delivery boy at Al Hujoon Cafeteria in Sharjah's Rolla area for about 18 years. He was well known among the locality's residents and business people, whom Abdulla served tea for years.

"He couldn't fulfill his dream of spending the sunset of his life in his own soil or his own hut in Arikkod Kadavu of Kumbala village in Kasaragode of the Southern India," says Fahad Manayath, a colleague of Abdulla.

"What has he done to deserve such punishment?" Fahad wailed in a state of shock.

"Abdulla returned home in penury even after decades of ceaseless labour in the hot desert sun, but half way through fate rerouted his trip to the world where there's no poverty," said Abdul Kader, a salesman in the next shop to Abdulla's cafeteria.

"The ill-fated unskilled worker from a lower middle class background lived in the UAE for 30 years a vacation-less and fun-less life," he added.

"Fervent dreams of a comfortable future for his children sustained him in the scorching desert heat. At last, he departed not waiting for the sympathy and generosity of the world," said Kader.

"I couldn't digest the news of his demise. Even yesterday evening, he served us tea. On the evening of the day of his departure too, he served me tea and snacks at my office," recollected a supermarket manager in the vicinity.

"Being a senior citizen, working still for his poor family back in India, Abdulla was well respected among us," he added.

"Now settled in Uddavaram in Manjeshwaram on the border area of Kerala and Karnataka states after selling off his property for daughter's marriage, Abdulla left for India this time for treatment of diabetes, severe pain on knees and high blood pressure," said Mohammed, owner of the Al Hujun Cafeteria.

He added, "Abdulla wished to return and continue his job. But while leaving he was unsure sure about the return, as he was suffering from the ailments for years. He said, he would come back only if got cured fully from the diseases."

According him, Abdulla came to the UAE about 25 years ago through Mumbai, and worked for eight years at a cafeteria called Al Ajidad, near Quwait mosque in Sharjah.

"He left the workplace as he was unable to survive with the low pay and later joined our restaurant, where he worked on a commission basis getting Dhs20 for a collection of Dhs100. So, he managed to earn more bucks," remarked Mohammed.

He noted, "Abdulla survived with a wife, seven children, including four girls and three boys. He married off two daughters earlier, and was now leaving for India planning the third daughter's marriage."

"His son Musthafa, who also works in a supermarket behind the cafeteria, left for India upon the news about his father's tragic demise in the tragedy.

Unfortunately, he could not attend Abdulla's funeral rites as Air India delayed its scheduled flight and the bereaved family members in India were helpless to wait with the charred body until the time of the son's arrival," he explained.

The poignant story of the unskilled worker spread grievance among the expatriate community from the Kasaragode district of Kerala and residents and business people in the Rolla area of Sharjah.

Providential Escape

BY PMA RASHEED

23 May 2010, The Gulf Today

The decision of a moment diverted them to an extended lease of delightful life.

Mohammed Shareef, a sales executive working at RAK Paints, would have lost lives of five members in his family including his own and his expected child's, if he hadn't cancelled his journey to his native place, Mangalore.

"Thank God for making me postpone the trip," he sighed in relief, referring to the ill-fated Air India Express flight, which he was supposed to take.

Hailing from Uppinangadi - a village proximate to Mangalore - Shareef, his pregnant wife Rukhsana, elderly mother Mariyumma and two-year-old daughter Shazmi, had scheduled their trip to Mangalore on Friday night by the Air India Express carrier Boeing 737-800 that crashed on Saturday.

"My pregnant wife was unable to fly on the day as per the schedule, so I postponed the trip for May 25 a few hours before the time," he said.

"My cousin Noushad, who is running an advertising firm in Sharjah, is supposed to come back to Dubai by the crashed flight in its return, scheduled for 8am Indian time," he added.

Anil Kumar, a salesman in City Light Electrical Suppliers in Rolla, had also postponed his scheduled trip by the crashed Flight IX892, eventually saving his life and dreams.

Kumar, hailing from Uduma area in Kasargode, said, "Due to urgent workload in our showroom, my manager forcefully asked me to cancel the journey."

"I am grateful to God for his mercy in saving my life, and to my superior for forcing to cancel the trip," he added.

Workload also pulled back Kunhikannan Chandu, a supermarket manager at Lulu in Al Qusais, from traveling by the crashed Air India Express carrier to Mangalore.

Chandu, a native of Kanjnagad in Kasargode district, said, "As my superior officer requested, I had to postpone my emergency leave taken for my son's college admission procedures."

"Thank God for saving me and my family," he added.

Ibrahim Moideen Kunju, employee of Daniel Cigarette factory, escaped death by a whisker thanks to a last minute goof-up. “I was planning to travel with a neighbour on the crashed plane, but had to cancel at the last minute because I could not get my passport back from the company HR manager.”

“The manager had promised to return it on Saturday and I did not inform my family about cancelling the trip. I had got married only three months ago and my wife, Fathima Najma, called me in the morning to know if I was alive,” he added.

Another person who had a narrow escape is Steven Rego, a student of Alosius College in Mangalore. Says his mother, Sheela Rego: “God had different plans. He was to board that flight. I booked the ticket for him but was confused about the date. We though the flight was at 1.15am tonight, so he did not make it. My son has been saved.”

Thresiamma Philip, a nurse in Dibba of Dubai, also missed the flight due to the same goof-up about its timing. “I thought the flight was on Saturday night. I saw my name among the list of dead being put out, but I am alive. I was going to Mangalore to meet my daughter studying there.

Hameed, secretary of a building owner in Rolla, said that his two friends had cancelled their trip by the crashed flight during the last hours, and flew to Calicut.

"The duo, businessmen Ameer and Basheer, changed their route in fear of getting trapped in a local strike and related safety risks due to a communal riot going around near Malligarjuna temple in part of Kararagode," he said.

"Eight other people from the same locality had also rerouted their trip through Calicut airport by Emirates flight, cancelling in the last moments their journey by the ill-fated Air India Express to Mangalore," said Khaleel, a shop owner from their native place in Kasargode.

"There was also a scare about the attacks from the communal rioters that emerged after the temple's wall was painted with colours and pictures resembling other religion's symbols," added the shop owner.

Retailers in Rolla mourn Mangalore air crash victims

BY PMA RASHEED

23 May 2010, The Gulf Today

The retail business community in Sharjah’s Rolla Square was in a state of shock after the Air India Express passenger plane crashed outside the Mangalore Airport in South India on Saturday.

The disaster killed at least a dozen workers from Kasargod district of Kerala employed in the market, while others working there lost relatives, friends and family.

The workers had happily seen off the victims at Dubai airport on the eve of the tragedy. The ill-fated 

were the sole breadwinners of their family.

One of the crash victims, 60-year-old Abdulla Mohammed, has been working at Al Hujoon Cafeteria in Rolla for about 20 years and was well-known among the residents and business people in the area.

“He was the market’s oldest men traveled by the crashed-passenger plane. I couldn’t digest the news of his demise. Even yesterday (Friday) evening, he served us tea,” recollected a supermarket manager in the vicinity.

“Being a senior citizen, working still for his poor family back in India, Abdulla was well respected among us. He had walked into each shop and bade his friends farewell in the excitement of heading home,” he added.

“He hailed from Arikkode Kadavathu in Kumbala area of Kasaragode. He left for India this time for treatment of a range of diseases, saying that he would return if he is cured fully,” said his colleague Fahad Manayath.

“He was going home to make arrangements for his daughter’s wedding. Residents, colleagues and friends of Abdullah came searching for him at the restaurant immediately after the news of the plane crash,” he added.

Mohammed Rafi, nephew of Abdulla, an employee of Al Kabayel Toys store in Rolla, has also died in the accident.

“The day was a black Saturday for all of us,” said Mohammed Shammer, a salesman at the toys shop, who lost roommate Rafi in the crash.

“Upon knowing the tragedy, Abdulla’s son Musthafa, who also working in the same area in a supermarket adjacent to his father’s restaurant, left for India to claim the bodies and attend burial ceremonies,” said Mohammed, owner of the Al Hujun Cafeteria.

Another victim of the plane crash was Balakrishnan Mullacheri, a sales executive at Al Ameera Supermarket in the same location.

Jayanth Lal, manager of the supermarket, said, “Balakrishnan was not ready to go this time, but was forced to fly to India for the treatment to his critically-sick mother.”

“We were informed through media channels about the death of the 48-year-old Mullachery. He was a gentleman. He worked with us for more than 10 years and we would have never let him go,” said Sukhdev Patidar, the owner of the supermarket.

Many other business people and workers in Rolla have lost their friends and relatives residing in different parts of the UAE.

Staff from Sahara Centre in Rolla, Durrathul Khaleej and other shops in the market also reported cases of deaths of their staff and relatives of staff members.

Expat children face serious identity crisis

BY PMA RASHEED

The Gulf Today, 25 April 2010

Termed as third culture kids, the children of expatriates living in a country like the UAE with a cross-cultural environment of mingling with people who come from more than 170 countries, face serious identity crisis, according to an expert.

Growing up among world kids can be, of course, rewarding to expat children as they are enriched by the many diverse experiences. On the other hand, they could end up become strangers not only among other expat children but also among children of their native countries, said Rebecca Grappo, a certified educational planner and consultant.

According to Grappo, who now resides in Dubai after living and practising in countries as a comprehensive educational strategist, the third culture kids build relationships with all of the international cultures, while not having full ownership in any.

She was speaking to The Gulf Today on the sidelines of an international conference on effective parenting held in Dubai on Saturday. The conference discussed the modern day parental dilemma of balancing love and anger and applying democratic parenting principles to raise the kids who think about tomorrow.

"As a result of their living in changing environments, they often develop a curious and active mind. On the other hand, the third culture kids experience reverse culture shock, when they go back to their home country to pursue higher studies. They try to fit in but often find it difficult to do so," pointed out Grappo.

"The mobile families want to ensure that their children's educational needs are met both at home and abroad. They are both traditional and non-traditional. Internationally, the mobile families are always in a state of transition," she noted.

"As they spend a significant part of their developmental years outside the parents' culture, they wonder where they belong, and don't understand why they feel so different from their peers when they return to the country of their passport. This is because emotional and physical status of the home may not be the same," she added.

"The good news is that such kids have friends all over the world, and the bad news is that their friends are all over the world. They invest heavily in relationships, also they are so tired of goodbyes that they become reluctant to invest in new relationships at their homeland," stated Grappo.

She warned that failure to adequately process their feelings or losses can lead to other emotions including anger, depression, denial, withdrawal from activities, rebellion, or self-destructive behaviour.

"Therefore, parents should help them bring out the best of these experiences and minimise and cope with the negatives. The third culture kids going back to their home country to attend college or university should be given proper guidelines," she advises.

"Moreover, the expatriate kids have to be provided with lessons from the early stages on the culture, tradition, language, culinary habits, religious and social values of their country of origin. They have to be properly guided through the transition in a way that enhances their resilience," she advised.

According to her, it's a good idea for the family to discuss the bumps in the road ahead and make a plan for how they will overcome them.

Mirza Al Sayegh, Director of the Office of Sheikh Hamdan Bin Rashid Al Maktoum, said, while speaking at the conference that parenting starts from the moment the baby is conceived.

"The parenting should only be up to the age of seven years. From seven to 14 years, the parents should be their teachers, and after the age of the 14 the children should be treated as friends by the parents," he opined.

He said that the mother is a sacred entity, quoting the Islamic concept of the mother, in her feet the paradise lies.

"Implementing the benefits of modern technology in the academic arena is also significant in raising the children free of hassles and burdens of the traditional concept of learning methods," he pointed out.

The experts participating at the conference organised by Dubai-based Ishara Consultants, included Dr Onita Nakra from University of Minnesota in USA, Clinical Psychologist Dr Saliha Afridi and Dr Samira Moosa, Head of Early Childhood Education at Sultan Qaboos University in Muscat, Oman.

They lectured on what triggers anger in a parent and resentment in a child, hidden feelings of frustration that often rise to the surface even in the most loving of parents, raising encouraged children, using foundational parenting skills to increase the confidence of parents, developing positive relations with children, identifying, understanding, and managing mistaken goals of child's misbehavior and helping children and adolescents to think about the future in a positive way.

Fund sought for Gulf returnees

BY PMA RASHEED

The Gulf Today, 15 Sep 2009

A UAE-based expatriate organisation has urged the Indian government to constitute a bill on a welfare fund to pay pension and other benefits to low-income segment returnees of Non-Residents Indians (NRI).

The Pravasi Bandhu Welfare Trust has sent the proposal to the Indian Union Ministry of Overseas Affairs and various state governments for the welfare fund that will benefit low and middle income NRIs.

According to KV Shamsudheen, Chairman of the Pravasi Bandhu Welfare Trust, the Central government of India and state governments should implement a legislation to help NRIs from the respective states, emulating the example of the state of Goa in this regard.

The Goa government had recently drafted a bill for the Non-Resident Goans' Welfare aimed at constituting a welfare fund to pay pension and other benefits to non-resident Indians of Goan origin, when they return and settle permanently in Goa.

"The proposed welfare fund for all Indian expatriates would bring great relief for the low and middle-income group among them. The low-income segment faces a challenging financial situation as they have no resources to continue their present lifestyle when they return to India," said Shamsudheen.

"We request various Indian state governments as well as the Ministry of Overseas Indian Affairs to constitute a scheme like Provident Fund to safeguard the low and middle income category of NRIs," he said.

According to him, states such as Kerala, Tamil Nadu, Karnataka, Andhra Predesh, Rajasthan and Bihar should follow the Goa model for the benefit of the expatriates from those states.

"The Non Resident Goans' Welfare Fund proposes that every non-resident Goan (NRG) member contribute Indian rupees 300 per month. Also, the NRG returnee member who settles permanently in Goa shall contribute 100 rupees to the fund each month," he added.

He explained that the Goan government will also contribute two per cent of the fund annually. NRGs aged between 18 and 55 years were eligible to register as a member of the fund. But a member cannot withdraw from the fund for five years.
"The proposed fund would be used for payment of pension to members who completed 60 years. It would also be used for payment of family pension on the death of a member, provide financial assistance during illness or accident, for marriage or maternity benefit of women members," he said.

Drowned man's body flown back to India

BY PMA RASHEED

The Gulf Today, 16 July 2009

The body of an Indian expatriate found dead last week in Jumeirah beach has been repatriated to his native place on Wednesday night.
Dubai Police had found the body of 31-year man Renup Kuttappan in Jumeirah beach last Thursday.
Renup hailed from the Kollam district of the Indian state of Kerala and his body was earlier identified by his relatives and colleagues.
The body has been transported to Thiruvananthapuram International Airport on Air India IX-540 on Wednesday, said his employer.
Renup, a sales person with Chungath jewellery located in Karama, was living with his wife in a flat in Deira.
The manager of the jewellery outlet Shony Pappachan told The Gulf Today that Renup went missing since Thursday. "He left the shop after it closed on Wednesday night and we didn't see him after that."
"As Renup was absent from work on Thursday, we tried to get in touch with him, but we couldn't. So we went to the police station to lodge a report," he said.
"We came to know from the police that his body was found dead on the beach. All our staff members are in a state of shock," he added.
"We saw the postmortem report and it stated accidental death while drowning in the sea," said Pappachan.
He noted that Renup had returned after his annual vacation recently and joined the outlet on the sixth of this month. He had been employed with the jewellery outlet for 18 months.
"Renup's wife had already gone back to India following his death. We came to know about it from the police. However, there is no evidence or confirmation whether the man had committed suicide," said Pappachan.
Meanwhile, the incident happens within a couple of days of the warning that came from Dubai Police that beachgoers should take extra caution while venturing into sea water during summer. Drowning incidents have been increasingly reported at this time of the year.
The police had warned beach-goers against ignoring weather changes while swimming in the beaches during the summer's poor weather conditions.